i love you, car alarm. you light up my life with your varied tone. you put my evening at ease, the reminder of life outside my door. you
stand for freedom. you stand for security. you tell the would-be intruder who's in control. not him, no sir. one bar of honks and he's outta
you give me the sampler. it's the throwback jersey of car alarm tones, for sure, but the classics never die. whoopwhoopwhoopwhoopwhoopwhoopwhoopwhoop. ROO ROO ROO ROO ROO ROO ROO ROO ROO. wahwahwahwahwahwahwahwahwahwahwahwah. bwoooooooooooooop. bwoooooooooooooop. bwoooooooooooooop. bwoooooooooooooop. doo DEEE doo DEEE doo DEEE doo DEEE doo DEEE doo DEEE doo DEEE.
you give me viper on. command it. demand it. STAND BACK. VIPER ON.
you give me the rhythmic honk. its monotone mastery advises against meddling. this is a system. you don't mess with a system. very matter-of-factly, just honk. honk. honk. honk. honk. honk. honk. honk.
you give me the abstract honk, interpreting the almighty agitated driver stuck in traffic. his is a tail to which we in our jumbled homes relate -- hear me roar, god damn it; stay far from the goods inside. that briefcase on the passenger seat is going to earn you a fistful of fury.
i love you, car alarm. in this world of efficiency on demand, you're 100%. you are the enforcer. no one dare approach your dexterity, your expertise. you're in charge. no broken glass. no slim jims. no grubby mitts. no dirty pedestrians. not so much as a glance.
it's your city -- your world, car alarm. i am but a staid passerby.